Trigger Warning: Some language about sexual violence to follow.
The following post is a crunk public service announcement for our own post most racial times.
For the record, being a white ally means…
Not expecting your friends/colleagues of color to do the heavy lifting around your own privilege…
Not recentering the conversation back to yourself when difficult subjects come up…
Not asking people of color to be less angry so you can really listen. Child, please…
Not petulantly zeroing in on petty aspects of a person of color’s argument or analysis because it makes you feel uncomfortable or illuminates holes in your thinking. It’s really transparent…
Not bringing up the fact that your best friend/boo/adopted stepchild is black/brown/polka-dotted. Such “facts” are not get-out-of-jail free cards for saying stupid shit or generally being racist. You can have intimate relationships with people of color and still have fucked up race politics….
Not expecting/demanding cookies and milk because you are pursuing anti-racist activism. While we may be happy to work with you, you are doing what you’re supposed to do. Period. Point blank…
During conversations about race, the phrases “race card” and “oversensitive” don’t even enter into your mind, much less escape your lips. It’s never the right answer.
And, never forget, being a white ally means being less concerned with potentially being called racist and more concerned with actually perpetuating racism.
I’ll end this PSA with the wise words of the late, great poet, Pat Parker.
“For the white person who wants to know how to be my friend”
the first thing you do is to forget that i’m Black.
Second, you must never forget that i’m Black.
You should be able to dig Aretha,
but don’t play here every time i come over.
An if you decide to play Beethoven-don’t tell me
his life story. They make us take music appreciation too.
Eat soul food if you like it, but don’t expect me
to locate your restaurants
of cook it for you.
And if some Black person insults you,
mugs you, rapes your sister, rapes you,
rips your house or is just being an ass-
please do not apologize to me
for wanting to do them bodily harm.
It makes me wonder if you’re foolish.
And even if you really believe Blacks are better lovers than
whites-don’t tell me. I start thinking of charging stud fees.
In other words-if you really want to be my friend-don’t
make a labor of it. I’m lazy. Remember.
This was a crunk public service announcement. Carry on.